The Idea a Selfie Gave Me

Yesterday I was trying to take a selfie and it took me at least 30 tries before I finally found one that I actually liked.

First I have to point out the fact that I HATE taking selfies. I can never quite get the right angle I’m looking for or what kind of face I should be making. In the end all my selfies end up looking the exact same because I always use my go to selfie face, smile and head tilt.

As I’m looking through all my selfies the idea suddenly pops into my head, what’s wrong with all my other selfies.

I could pick out a billion things I hated about each one, but they were simply just me picking apart my insecurities. I don’t like the way I smile because I think it’s crooked. I only take selfies from a certain angle because I don’t want to show my “bad side”. I can’t show my messy bed in the background because that’s not “aesthetic”.

I stopped and thought, why am I not embracing who I am?

I’m not perfect and I don’t try to be. I’m not the most beautiful girl in the world, but I don’t act like I am. I don’t have it all together and that’s okay because how many of us actually do. So, again why am I not embracing who I am?

So many of us girls out there scroll through social media for hours looking at our favorite celebs, Instagram Influencers or fitness models, and compare ourselves to them. I fall into this trap as well at times. I used to scroll through Instagram for hours, thinking about how does this girl have it all together and she’s my age, or how does she make every single picture on her profile look so flawless.

What we should be focusing is being better than the person we were yesterday.

This was as I was in the beginning stages of my recovery, and I made a pact with myself from that point on to start embracing myself for who I was. I was only making myself feel worse by continuously comparing myself to other people, rather than just being happy with where I am and who I was.

I knew that I had to start changing my outlook, and how I reacted to situations and things. My goal each day was to look at myself in the mirror and say something that I loved about myself. It’s nice to receive compliments from others, but when you don’t believe them yourself it doesn’t quite mean the same. I needed to start believing them myself before I could be confident in my own skin.

This was something I also worked on with my psychologist at the time. I would talk with her about different situations that happened during the week and my anxiety attacks, and she would ask me how that situation made me feel. Where I was at mentally during this time everything that happened seemed like it was the end of the world, but that was the problem.

The way I reacted to things or situations was causing me more anxiety because I was overthinking and stressing myself out. So going forward if something happened throughout the week that gave me anxiety she asked me to write down what happened, how it made me feel, how I reacted and what I could have done better.

Believe it or not this actually really helped me. It helped me evaluate the situation and understand the way I was reacting. Sometimes overthinking caused the situation to become worse than what it had to be. So by changing the mindset that the world is ending versus, okay, this happened but what did I learn and how am I going to improve, I noticed huge improvements in my anxiety symptoms.

The pictures we post on Instagram is a reflection of our best selves at that particular moment. We are all at different points in our lives, some get there sooner than others and that’s okay. It doesn’t make you any less worthy of the things life has to offer just because you didn’t get your dream job until you were 40 or you don’t live a super lavish lifestyle to post all over Instagram.

The most beautiful and powerful thing any girl can have is confidence. You give girl confidence and she will be unstoppable.


  1. Change your mindset. Change how you react to situations or things that happen. Instead of feeling like your world is going to end, accept that it happened and improve yourself.
  2. Accept where you are is right where you’re supposed to be.
  3. Start being CONFIDENT in you.




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